Hey sweet friends and family,

Some of you probably think I fell off the face of the earth. I may have! No really, life has been crazy hectic. I can't seem to stay on top of things. I do love my life though. It's a wild wild ride. I have been thinking a lot lately about how my life looks quite a bit like a chick flick and that has made me wonder about the destination of this ride. Because of that, I thought I'd use some of the theme's I see in chick flicks to describe my life and how you can pray for me.

The history...
If my life were a chick flick it'd start with a scene on the playground of a chubby little girl in goodwill clothes playing alone in the dirt. Kids would run by and call her names. She'd use sticks or Barbies or just her imagination to play out a world where her grown up self was loved and cherished by and of course married to a wonderful man who thought she was amazing just how she was. This is important information because it tells a lot about why she does what she does later in life.
Please pray for me as I live the journey of letting my past develop me, instead of overpower me.

The ambition...
Fast forward to a just turned 26 year old woman with a Bachelor's degree, pursuing her masters, a nice car, a great job, and a house. She's not married (a fact that lingers in the back of her mind all the time), but she has plenty of which to be proud. She now knows how to dress and carry herself so that people don't make fun of her (as much). She has a large number of acquaintances, a good number of friends, and a couple people who she tries to let know her intimately. She really has come a long way. Sure she's fake sometimes, but she works hard not to be so. She is goal oriented and refuses to let anything hold her back.
However, she hides it (but not well) when she struggles. She takes on so much to overcompensate for her past that she drowns in her own dreams. She forgets that success is a hike not a sprint. She wants to do it herself, because as she learned in the playground, others are not to be trusted. She fills her life with accomplishment because it masks loneliness.
Pray for me that I can learn how to lean on God and others. Pray that I would put my pride into God and not into what I do. Pray that I wouldn't let my failures define me, but that they would shape me.

The family...
When her family falls to pieces, she is always there to pick them up. Of course, not being a miracle worker, she struggles; but she always tries. When her little sister doesn't have another place to live with her 3 kids (Jay, 3 ½, Gabrielle, 2 ½, and Lucy 18 mo), she tells them to move in with her. She pays for their upkeep and plays mommy as long as it takes for her sister to get on her feet, even though she hardly has the energy or finances for her own life. Chaos and laughter ensue in true Hollywood style as kids run naked through the house and the dog chases after licking little fingers.
Please pray that my sister would learn to be a mommy and that I could be aunt. If that's not going to happen, please pray that God would provide strength and courage to do what needs to be done. Please pray for finances to be just right to keep us fed, clothed, and housed. Please pray for amazing childcare. Please pray for patience and love for me. Please pray protection over the kids.

The romance...
She has had a series of less-than boyfriends, horrible dates, and dry spells. The girl who dreamed as a child of building a family is wondering if that will ever happen. Other's try lovingly to provide words of comfort but somehow it always makes it worse. She can't always pinpoint what it is that causes that feeling in the pit of her stomach, but she's sure it has something to do with Ken telling Barbie he loved her just as she was and wanted to spend the rest of his life hanging out with her.
Please pray for me and my heart. Pray that I would continue to be protected from the wrong guys. Pray for ... whatever God wants! If the ache is good for me, I want the strength to cherish it as His gift. If there is a man for me, I want him to be blessed by my life now and in the future.

The lesson...
She of course has a lesson to learn. She probably has several. You can see hints of the need to draw boundaries with her family or to find her self worth in something other than accomplishments. You hear her desire for acceptance but her unwillingness to open up. The most important lesson you see running throughout is the one of the greatest love of her life chasing her and her running from it. She can see him and hear him and is afraid of what it would cost to give herself to him. She doesn't fully trust him because she doesn't fully trust anyone else. She is confident that he can betray her.

Of course, I'm talking of Jesus. His love for me surpasses all. Now, I am fully aware that my life is not a Hollywood movie. I know that John Cusack or Luke Wilson are not going to show up and sweep me off my feet and I'm not sure I'd want it anyway. I told a girlfriend of mine “My life is like a chick flick, I'm just waiting on my happy ending.” I was of course talking about the John or Luke who should be approaching me any minute. The truth? I'm living my happy ending. I will always have lessons to learn and I pray I am open to them until I join Jesus at Home. Until then, I have a house and a little family for whom to care, just like I dreamed! I have friends who love me just as I am, just like I dreamed! I have a great career and education looming before me, just like I dreamed! And I have no end of possibilities, just like I dreamed!

Thanks Jesus for loving me so very very much! I have to be honest, I really am crying as I write these words! Forget the chick flick, give me my own life.

I love you all...

Dearest Friends and family

The other day, I drove home from work and thought about all that had changed. I thought about all things I wanted ten years ago and all the things I have now. I remembered the places I've been, the people I've met, and the things I've seen. I've led a vegabond life in my few years of adulthood. It's been a wild ride. The ride's not over yet. I live in the freedom of God's power over my life. I know that life is not how I planned it, but it's how He planned it and I like it that way. I live in excitement about what He's got next. I'd love to share some of it with you, my dear friends and family.

Changes in work

I think I have told you that I have been promoted to supervisor. I have been waiting on this position for a while now and am thrilled to have it. It's hard work and there is a lot I don't know, but I love it. I think I'm pretty good at it. I love my team and am excited about the chance to develop my skills and theirs while doing something we love. Please pray that I become a better leader. Pray for wisdom. I need the foresight to anticipate breakdowns and make plans to prevent crises, and the ability to think on my feet when crises occur. Pray for the ability to maintain appropriate mental and emotional boundaries while still devoting enough time and energy to my staff and clients.

Changes in school

I have been in seminary for almost a semester now. Again, it's hard but I love it. It's hard to prioritize classes when I have friends and work and church and family and other life events pressing so hard around me. And yet I know that it needs to be a priority. I need to sharpen my mind with knowledge of others of my own time and of the brilliance behind me. I need to be pressed by my peers to think and explain. I need to know the relationship between faith and reason. Pray that God would strengthen me to do these things.

Changes in fellowship

I wasn't sure how to title this segment. Do I talk about church? Friends? Faith? But all of those things belong so solidly together. I am learning more and more about what the Church of Christ is meant to be and about how far away from it we are. I am increasingly disappointed with the “traditional church” and yet enthralled by the people who have walked the path already. I long for community with like minded people. I long to be a greater impact in my direct community. And so, on Sunday's when some file in and out of fancy church buildings like it's a fast food restraunt, I and 4 other friends lounge in a living room stumbling through scripture and faith and life together. We fail more than we succeed, but we have learned to see failings as success and success as a gift. Pray that we would let God lead, not our bitterness, complaints, or youthful egotism. Pray that we would be devoted to God and each other in our everyday lives. (While you're at it, you can check out our website: http://livingroomchurch.wordpress.com/)

Changes in housing

I have been living in Nashville for coming on two years. Can you believe I have been in one place this long? No, I can't either! Something else I can't believe? My desire to buy a house. I have felt so passionate over the past year about being a part of a real community, of adding to (not taking from) the world around me, and of committing to something. I have felt my heart tugging at having a “place of my own”. And so I have begun the process. I have been pre-approved for the loan and start house hunting this weekend. I am looking for a 3 bedroom house with a good yard and a porch. I want a place that can be used for ministry. I want to be free to take in unwed pregnant girls or international students or refugees or my friends who just need a place to stay. I want to have a garden. I want to be able to make healthy fresh food and have friends over to eat. Please pray for strong guidance in this. Please pray that the path is lain before me and that I have the courage to take it. Please pray that God will guide me to the people who need a home with me.

Changes in family

I won't go into a lot of detail about my family right here, but I will tell you that there is, as always, a lot going on. Shawna, my little sister, and her 3 beautiful babies are in special need of prayer as she makes choices that impact the rest of their lives. My brother Ken is expecting a new baby with his girlfriend Carly. Please pray for them. The rest of the family needs prayers of thanksgiving and petition as well. When you pray for me, please pray for them too.

Changes in status

I am no longer a woman who writes poetry. I am a published poet! That's right, one of my poems was selected to go into a poetry anthology. I'm not going to get rich off of this (in fact, I'm not going to make any money). I'm certainly not going to get famous (you can only buy the book directly from the publishers). But I hope that my poem will be inspiring to those who read it. I pray that God uses my voice to speak to people who might not have heard Him otherwise. Pray with me that my hearts words would be used for Him.

Thanks friends for all your prayers. As Thanksgiving and Christmas draw close, joining me in thanking our Father for His love. I have so much in my life because He loves me and wants to use me. He has lavished each of us with special blessings. Lets thank Him together! As always, pass this or any part of it on to anyone who you thing would appreciate it.

Rejoice always, Pray unceasingly, Love extravagantly, and to Him be all the glory,
Sarah
He has told you, O man, what is good;
And what does the LORD require of you
But to do justice, to love kindness,
And to walk humbly with your God?
Micah 6:8